Why Kids Need to Read What They Want

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Is this how we want kids to act when it comes to reading? / flicker, C. Bitner

In the most recent edition of Cover to Cover by K.T. Horning, there are no early childhood, middle grade, or ya distinctions in books for children. Encompassing fiction and nonfiction, the breakdown is:

  • Picture books (including board books)
  • Readers/Beginning Readers/Easy Readers
  • Transitional books
  • Chapter books

That’s it. We have those formats, and within those formats, every genre is covered, for ages birth to teen. (Oh, but wait–where should graphic novels go? I’d include them with chapter books, honestly; the art in a graphic novel serves as a concurrent visual text, in my opinion. Or, heck, let’s put them in with picture books, maybe? I don’t have all the answers, clearly.)

In my ideal, imaginary library, this is how it would be– those formats would be organized, so kids who are being read to can find board and picture books, pre-readers can find the books they need, transitional readers the same, and then chapter books for independent readers who can make their own choices (with guidance from their parent/guardian and, ideally, a librarian). There would be a call number, and no other designations– no guided reading, or any of that other stuff. Just books and excellent staff and seemingly limitless choices. (I’m getting chills just writing about it.)

Does a library like this exist? Probably not. Although my personal library is like this. I’m sure everyone’s personal library is like this. So why do we insist that youth follow dozens of arbitrary guidelines when it comes to the stories they get to read?

Anyway. This summer I tried something different with our suggested reading book lists, in an attempt to create a small scale version of this literary utopia. I wanted to move away from parents just grabbing the list of their child’s grade, and slavishly following those suggestions we’d made, with the best of intentions. Instead of lists covering 2 grade levels, as had been the practice in the past, I had:

  • Pre-readers (babies-Kindergarten): includes board and picture books, all genres
  • Beginning readers (K-3rd): easy/beginning readers, all genres
  • Transitional Third Grade reads: transitional chapter books, all genres
  • Third Grade and Up: picture, beginning, transitional, and chapter books, all genres

Now, there isn’t just one Third Grade and Up list, oh no. There were several, with titles like:

  • Smile Diary: books for Wimpy Kid and Telgameier Fans
  • Murder and Mayhem: stories that are scary and thrilling
  • WONDERing what to read next: Wonder readalikes
  • Full STEAM ahead: books for kids who like to tinker and create
  • Myths, Magic and More: fantasy, science fiction, and the just plain strange
  • Game On: books for gamers
  • Tell Me A Story: books about the magic of storytelling
  • That’s Funny: Books to make you laugh
  • Can You Believe It?: Books to make you see the world in a different way

The books were listed not in alphabetical order, but rather in order of literary and thematic complexity.

To explain, each list had an introduction like this:

3rd Grade and Up

Murder and Mayhem: stories that are scary and thrilling!

If you enjoy scary stories, thrilling tales of true crime, forensic science, and the unexplained, then these books are for you!

Read from the beginning of the list when you’re short on time but still want a good story. Read from the end of the list when you’re up for a more textually and thematically challenging experience.

Not every book on every list will be right for your child. If you have questions about any title, please see [library] staff for guidance.

Third grade and up meant just that: independent readers from third to twelfth grades (or beyond! Mom and Dad, you can read these books too!) could read these books, all of which were chosen from our children’s department collection. I wanted to do this so that an older student who wasn’t reading at grade level wouldn’t be stigmatized by reading from a list that was clearly marked for a younger age. By having only a lower limit, rather than a lower and upper, the list was more open to more readers. And by keeping the selections limited to our children’s department, we were still helping parents make appropriate choices for their child (advocate for freedom that I am, I still want to make things easier for parents, so I’m not going to hand them a third grade and up list with really intense themes and situations).

Oh, and another cool thing–the books on these lists were jointly nominated by my library staff as well as school librarians from our main school district, and they used these lists as their district’s recommended summer reading. How great is that? School librarians got to suggest awesome books that they loved, while I did all the grunt work of collating and organizing them, and our wonderful graphics department made them into beautiful brochures.

Ultimately, I wanted these lists to provide some guidance, while also encouraging kids and parents to use library staff to help them find the  best book for them.

For teens we had 7th grade and up lists, with items exclusively from the teen collection. (Now, ideally I’d want to include picture and other books, but with display and cataloging restraints, this just wasn’t possible; and, again, these teens could also enjoy all the books on the third grade and up lists.)

For teens, our themes were:

  • Social Justice: books about making the world a better place
  • Not Okay: readalikes for The Fault in Our Stars 
  • Get Real: Realistic fiction and memoirs
  • Myths, Magic and More: Fantasy, sci-fi, and speculative fiction

I have to say, the impetus for this project was the book Reading Unbound: Why Kids Need to Read What They Want—and Why We Should Let Them. We actually recommended this title to parents in our lists, and amazingly, the book got checked out. How many people actually read it, I don’t know, but it just goes to show that if you make something available, people will take advantage.

I was concerned about confusion and push back–would parents get on board? Would they understand it? Was I creating a problem where there wasn’t one?

I don’t think so. I actually think these lists have been doing what they are meant to do–broaden the scope of what kids read, and providing guidance while also encouraging choice.

Now, summer’s not over, so the verdict isn’t completely in yet, but so far I’m going to call this a success. Books are still getting checked out at a rapid clip, I’ve heard people express delight at the themes, and so far no one has been upset that a book about the Lizzie Borden case was on the “Murder and Mayhem” list (really, with a title like that, I was suspecting parents of sensitive kids would know to steer clear).

What do you think? How do you handle suggested reading/passive reader’s advisory?

 

 

 

 

Alice + Freda Forever: A Murder in Memphis

Publisher’s information:

Alice + Freda Forever: A Murder in Memphis
In 1892, America was obsessed with a teenage murderess, but it wasn’t her crime that shocked the nation – it was her motivation. Nineteen-year-old Alice Mitchell planned to pass as a man and marry seventeen-year-old Freda Ward, but when their love letters were discovered, they were forbidden to ever speak again. Desperate and isolated, Alice pilfered her father’s razor, and on a cold winter’s day, she slashed her ex-fiancée’s throat. Now more than 120 years later, their tragic but true story is being told. Alice + Freda Forever, by historian Alexis Coe and with illustrations by Sally Klann, is embellished with letters, maps, historical documents, and more. (Alice + Freda Forever: A Murder in Memphis by Alexis Coe / Published by Zest Books and distributed by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt / ISBN-13: 978-1-936976-60-7 / $16.99 Hardcover; 224 pages, Ages 16+)

Alice+FredaForever_9781936976607I have to say I love this book. Like many I go through reading phases, including but not limited to: YA Fantasy and Sci-fi, YA Romance, Adult Fantasy and Sci-fi, Comfort Rereads, Biographies, Radiolab-esque nonfiction, and the genre that Alice + Freda Forever falls under, True Crime. One of my favorite true crime stories is that of Juliette Hulme and Pauline Parker, which, while a different story, does contain a couple of similar elements (which is something I asked Alexis about in my interview with her, which you can read here), so when the chance to read Alice + Freda Forever came up, I quickly took it.

In my work as a youth librarian who works closely with educators, I often think about how the books I read could be used by teachers, and I can see a lot of ways that Alice + Freda Forever could be used in high school classrooms and even in college classrooms, in addition to just being a great, high-interest read. Pair it with Orlando and discuss gender identity, or with In Cold Blood to compare and contrast murder narratives. Assign it in a course about civil rights along with reading the works of Ida B. Wells. Include it in a reading list about obscure and outdated diseases. The possibilities are endless and that is, for me, a mark of quality nonfiction.

Although this book is definitely aimed at an older audience, with upper high school at the low end, I am really, really happy to see the copious amount of research that was done, and the list of sources that were referenced. Nonfiction for youth, despite being an in demand property, is, in my opinion, often lacking in references and source material, and the authority of the author is often questionable (have you noticed how many former lawyers write children’s nonfiction these days?). This is not the case with Alexis Coe, I am glad to say.

I also thought the design of this book was beautiful, and spot on for its audience. I can see teens who enjoy graphic memoirs easily embracing this beautifully illustrated title, and reluctant readers being pulled in by the striking red cover.

AliceFreda_parting
Alice and Freda parting.

One final note about this book and its imprint, Pulp. Ever since the term “new adult” appeared on the scene, I’ve scorned it. It seemed silly, redundant, and none of the books bearing that stamp seemed at all fresh or interesting to me. But then Pulp gave me a definition of new adult that I could accept and even support:

At Zest Books, we’ve been publishing nonfiction books for teens and young adults since 2006, but we’re growing up a little bit in 2014: Today we’re proud to announce our launch of Pulp, an imprint for “new adults.” Like our previous Zest titles, the books in the Pulp imprint will include contemporary and narrative nonfiction books, specializing in memoirs, graphic novels, and art and humor books, but for a slightly older audience. […] We’re looking forward to taking even more risks with these books, especially in terms of how we cover our topics. Many of our Zest authors were coming to us because, as readers, they appreciated our honesty and curiosity, but that sensibility is something that has value for adults as well. In fact, that sensibility is already being reflected at sites like Rookie and The Toast, where some of our current authors now publish. Additionally, the issues that we’re now covering for teens—such as sexuality, health, behavior, and relationships—shift significantly as young adults mature, and the Pulp line allows us to expand both what we can cover and how we can cover it. Some of our Pulp books will have immediate appeal to teens in the same way that our Zest Books titles often sell into the adult market. We embrace that fluidity, while at the same time recognizing a need to let booksellers and librarians know how our respective books are intended. (Emphasis added. Via Zest’s website).

Anyway, this book is a great read and belongs in most public and academic library collections, and could certainly see some applications in upper high school courses. Highly recommended.

Uncommonly Good Books (and more!) for Common Core Instruction

uncommonbooks (pdf of slide show)coreNovember 1st, ISLMA Conference 2013, Springfield, IL

Hi ISLMA friends! I’ll be updating this post during the upcoming week, adding annotations and the new resources I added for the second chance presentation. Thanks so much for coming, and if there’s anything you’d like to add please leave a comment!

Here is my list of resources from my presentation for ISLMA. Annotations in quotes taken directly from the website of the resource.

This post is updated as of 11/8/2013. It will be a living document and be revised as further resources are found.

ALA

The ALA award and booklists are a natural place to start. Here’s a handy run down of all the lists and awards.

YALSA

http://www.ala.org/yalsa/great-graphic-novels
http://www.ala.org/yalsa/outstanding-books-college-bound
http://www.ala.org/yalsa/popular-paperbacks-young-adults
http://www.ala.org/yalsa/quick-picks-reluctant-young-adult-readers
http://www.ala.org/yalsa/readers-choice
http://www.ala.org/yalsa/fabulous-films
http://www.ala.org/yalsa/best-fiction-young-adults
http://www.ala.org/yalsa/amazing-audiobooks

ALSC

http://www.ala.org/alsc/booklists
http://www.ala.org/alsc/awardsgrants/bookmedia
http://mrschureads.blogspot.com/ (Newbery and Caldecott Challenges)

Other Book Awards

Cybils
http://www.cybils.com/
The Cybils are given out by book bloggers, whose ranks include teachers, librarians, authors, and voracious readers. Awards are given in many categories, including book apps, speculative fiction, beginning chapter books, poetry, and nonfiction. “The Cybils awards are given each year by bloggers for the year’s best children’s and young adult titles.”

Eisner Awards
http://www.comic-con.org/awards/eisners-current-info
The Eisner awards are considered the “oscars” of comic books.

Science Fiction Awards

I’m a big proponent of using science fiction and fantasy as a way to ease into having kids read books with more “text complexity.” The world building, vocabulary, and themes inherent in most speculative fiction make an easy argument for complexity. Plus, the genres can have a lot of reader appeal (seeing as the dystopian and paranormal subgenres are part of speculative fiction).

The Hugo Awards
http://www.thehugoawards.org
The Hugo Awards are a set of awards given annually for the best science fiction or fantasy works and achievements of the previous year.

Mythopoeic Society
http://www.mythsoc.org
The Mythopoeic Society is a national/international organization promoting the study, discussion, and enjoyment of fantastic and mythopoeic literature through books and periodicals, annual conferences, discussion groups, awards, and more.”

The Nebula Awards
http://www.sfwa.org/nebula-awards/
The Andre Norton Award for Young Adult Science Fiction and Fantasy is an annual award presented by theScience Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America (SFWA) to the author of the best young adult or middle grade science fiction or fantasy book published in the United States in the preceding year.”

Multicultural Awards

You can’t deny that we live in a global society, and kids need books that act as windows into this wider world. Being aware of what other countries consider to be excellent examples of children’s literature is one way to do this; seeking out awards for specific cultures is another.

Carnegie and Kate Greenaway Medals
http://www.carnegiegreenaway.org.uk/home/
“The CILIP Carnegie and Kate Greenaway Medals are the UK’s oldest and most prestigious children’s book awards. Often described by authors and illustrators as ‘the one they want to win’ – they are the gold standard in children’s literature.” Essentially Britain’s Caldecott and Newbery.

International Board on Books for Young People
Hans Christian Andersen Awards
http://www.ibby.org/index.php?id=273
Every other year IBBY presents the Hans Christian Andersen Awards to a living author and illustrator whose complete works have made a lasting contribution to children’s literature.”
IBBY Honor list
http://www.ibby.org/index.php?id=270

TD Canadian Children’s Literature Award
http://www.bookcentre.ca/awards/td_canadian_childrens_literature_award
“On October 28, 2004 the Canadian Children’s Book Centre and the TD Bank Group announced the establishment of a brand-new annual, children’s book award, the TD Canadian Children’s Literature Award for the most distinguished book of the year. “Distinguished” is defined as marked by conspicuous excellence and/or eminence, individually distinct and noted for significant achievement with excellence in quality.”

Tomás Rivera Book Award
http://riverabookaward.org/book-award-winners/
http://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/tomas-rivera-award
“Texas State University College of Education developed the Tomas Rivera Mexican American Children’s Book Award to honor authors and illustrators who create literature that depicts the Mexican American experience.  The award was established in 1995 and was named in honor of Dr. Tomas Rivera, a distinguished alumnus of Texas State University.”

Bibliographies and Databases

The Center for Children’s Books
http://ccb.lis.illinois.edu
The Center for Children’s Books (CCB) at the Graduate School of Library and Information Science (GSLIS) is a crossroads for critical inquiry, professional training, and educational outreach related to youth-focused resources, literature and librarianship. The Center’s mission is to facilitate the creation and dissemination of exemplary and progressive research and scholarship related to all aspects of children’s and young adult literature; media and resources for young (age 0-18) audiences; and youth services librarianship.”

Cooperative Children’s Book Center, University of Wisconsin-Madison
http://ccbc.education.wisc.edu/books/default.asp
Cooperative Children’s Book Center is a unique and vital gathering place for books, ideas, and expertise in the field of children’s and young adult literature.”

Picture Book Month
http://picturebookmonth.com
http://picturebookmonth.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Picture-Book-MonthTeachers-Guide.pdf
Picture Book Month is an international literacy initiative that celebrates the print picture book during the month of November.

Picture Book Database
http://www.picturebookdatabase.com
Anyone who loves picture books … authors, illustrators, public librarians, media specialists, educators, researchers, students, and parents. The database eliminates the need to consult multiple resources and helps readers find picture books that best suit their needs.”

Reading Rockets
http://www.readingrockets.org
“Reading Rockets is a national multimedia literacy initiative offering information and resources on how young kids learn to read, why so many struggle, and how caring adults can help.”

Text Types

One of the elements of the Common Core State Standards is the different text types children will be required to read, including fairy tales and folk tales, myths, drama, poetry, and technical writing. These are some of my favorite sources for a wide variety of text types that have kid appeal.

Best American Series
http://www.hmhbooks.com/hmh/site/bas
The Best American Series is an annually-published collection of books, published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, each of which features a different genre or theme. Each book selects from works published in North America during the previous year, selected by a guest editor who is an established writer within the given field.”

Sur La Lune Fairytales
http://www.surlalunefairytales.com
SurLaLune Fairy Tales features 49 annotated fairy tales, including their histories, similar tales across cultures, modern interpretations and over 1,500 illustrations. Also discover over 1,600 folktales & fairy tales from around the world in more than 40 full-text eBooks. Read the SurLaLune Blog where daily postings discuss fairy tales in popular culture and academia and more.”

Bloggers

Bookshelves of Doom
http://bookshelvesofdoom.blogs.com
Leila reviews a lot of speculative fiction, and also reviews for Kirkus.

Shakespeare Teacher
http://www.shakespeareteacher.com/blog/
“This blog isn’t exclusively about Shakespeare. Instead, it is approached with the philosophy that a love of Shakespeare is only the beginning of a life of examination and discovery. This is a blog that documents that journey, and tries to have some fun along the way. The title, I think, has more to do with the author than with the intended audience at the moment.

I am involved with a variety of professional activities in the broad field of teacher education. I only occasionally teach Shakespeare, but that’s where my background and passions lie, and the name Shakespeare Teacher makes sense to those who know me.”

Stacked Books
http://www.stackedbooks.org
One of the most comprehensive book review sites for YA literature. Great booklists, great information about the publishing industry, and thorough reviews– great to turn to when you need the full scoop but don’t have time to read the entire book yourself.

Audio & Visual Resources

Lit2Go
http://etc.usf.edu/lit2go/
Lit2Go is a free online collection of stories and poems in Mp3 (audiobook) format. An abstract, citation, playing time, and word count are given for each of the passages. Many of the passages also have a related reading strategy identified. Each reading passage can also be downloaded as a PDF and printed for use as a read-along or as supplemental reading material for your classroom.”

L.A. Theatre Works
http://www.latw.org/
L.A. Theatre Works is a non-profit media arts organization based in Los Angeles whose mission for over 25 years has been to present, preserve and disseminate classic and contemporary plays.

Our unique hybrid form of audio theatre and innovative use of technology in the production and dissemination of theatre keeps this venerable art form thriving, assuring wide and affordable access.”

National Theater Live
http://ntlive.nationaltheatre.org.uk/
“National Theatre Live is the National Theatre’s groundbreaking project to broadcast the best of British theatre live from the London stage to cinemas across the UK and around the world.”

Digital Theater
http://www.digitaltheatre.com/
“Digital Theatre works in partnership with Britain’s leading theatre companies to capture live performance authentically onscreen. With our unique methods we bring online a library of diverse and acclaimed productions from some of the finest theatre talent around. Each production is available to rent online for a limited period or downloaded to your desktop and enjoyed as many times as you wish.”

Book Talkin’

(You need to sing the title of this post to the tune of “Jive Talkin'”)

via the new york city public library's flickr page
via the new york city public library’s flickr page

As the school year draws rapidly to a close (seriously, where did it go?) I’ve been reflecting on my first year as a school outreach librarian. I can’t tell you how invigorating it has been to use different skills and get to try new things with a wide variety of audiences. One of my favorite programs this year was all of the booktalks I did for middle schoolers (6th-8th grade) and teachers. In my previous six years as a librarian, I had done very few book talks. It was something I really wanted to do, but it just never happened in previous positions.

I was extremely lucky that I started out this school year being invited to book talk first to two groups of teachers, one elementary and one middle school. After getting to see me and my colleague book talk, teachers had a sense of who I was, how I behaved, and liked me enough to want to have me get up in front of their students. This was a great break for me, and once one class had me and my coworker in, all of the rest of them wanted us, too.

This year I averaged about two book talks a month, usually spending an entire school day (8 a.m.-2 p.m.) talking to multiple classes. Often I was solo, but several times I was lucky enough to be joined by members of our teen staff. While I can do these book talks alone, six hours of booktalking is a long time, and even with a partner I’m exhausted by the end of the day. I vastly prefer booktalking as a team for two major reasons (other than the fact that it helps to save your voice):

1) Variety. With two readers sharing books, the kids will get a wider variety than from one person alone. While I am very careful to select a variety of books, there are certain genres and topics I just can’t muster much enthusiasm for. I can fake it, sure, but why do that when a coworker is just nuts about the books I’m lukewarm about? While I’m pretty good at selling any book, kids can tell the difference between my genuine enthusiasm and the enthusiasm I put on for their sake.

2) Attachment Librarianing. This is something I carried over from my preschool teaching days, and I think it really applies to librarianship. Kids and teens are all unique, and not every personality is going to have a great fit with every kid or teen out there. For example, I quickly bond with shy, nerdy, awkward kids and teens (I try to find the Whovians in every middle school class as fast as I can). Other kids like me just fine, and I can and love to help everyone, but the geeky kids are more likely to seek me out and will get better recommendations from me, just because we’re so simpatico. With more staff available, more kids are likely to find the librarian whose style and personality speaks to them, which equals better service.

For me, booktalks are a lot like storytimes for older kids. While I don’t reveal endings or major plot points when I book talk, I do tell a story to get kids invested and interested. A lot of times I will use the theme of a novel or a hook from a nonfiction title to riff for a while. Just call me the wholesome Richard Pryor of librarianship. For example, when I booktalk Fourmile by Watt Key, I spend a lot of time talking with kids about PTSD, the stigma of mental illness in our culture, how we treat our soldiers, and why so many books for kids feature dead dogs (seriously!). When I talk about Almost Astronauts, I tell them the anecdote about Jerrie Cobb shattering all isolation booth records (NINE HOURS AND FORTY MINUTES Y’ALL), yet never getting the chance to be an astronaut. From there, I talk a bit about how women are seen in our culture and how we are treated.

My style is a little unconventional, I suppose, but it works for me, and it works for many of the kids I booktalk to. And that’s the important thing, I think–is to find your own personal style, your voice. That’s what will make your book talks exciting and get the kids interested in reading the books you’re pushing.

And what books do I push? It depends. If a teacher is working on a genre study, I’ll bring titles in that genre. Often I like to do a mixture of fiction and nonfiction, new books and backlist. I try to have books at a wide variety of reading levels with a variety of appeal factors. Most of all, I strive to bring books that I’ve read completely and have a component that I am super, super excited about. Even if I didn’t personally love the book, if there’s a crazy character or fascinating setting that I can see kids being interested in, I’ll definitely book talk that sucker.

So that’s just a little bit about my new favorite professional responsibility. What about you–do you book talk? What’s your style? Any favorite titles?

fact and fiction: tiger, tiger burning bright

Can We Save The Tiger? by Martin Jenkins, illustrated by Vicky White

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Dorje’s Stripes by Anshumani Ruddra, illustrated by Gwangjo and Jung-a Park

These two titles both address the topic of extinction, and in each title it is the artwork that most strongly pleads the case. In Can We Save the Tiger?, Vicky White’s pencil drawings are sparingly augmented with color. In a time when high quality photos of animals are relatively easy to take and distribute, there is something about illustrations that gives these animals the charming wonder of storybook characters, and may perhaps make a certain kind of child connect with them even more strongly than they would if viewing a photograph. White’s dodo could be cousin to Tenniel’s Dodo from Carroll’s Alice books, and her sleeping, lurking tigers bring to mind the great feline Aslan from the Narnia books. Yet this book is decidedly non fiction, and it includes an index and a list of more resources for readers to peruse.

Djore’s Stripes covers much the same territory via an original narrative that reads much like a fairy tale or fable. Each of the stripes on Djore, a tiger who lives with monks, represents a number of tigers. As tigers disappear, so do Djore’s stripes; as the population slowly recovers, Djore’s stripes follow in kind. The watercolor artwork by Gwangjo and Jung-a Park illustrates this beautifully, with the washes of color giving the story a haunting loveliness that goes beyond the text.

Can We Save the Tiger? reviewed from a library copy; Djore’s Stripes, publisher review copy.

nontraditional: a list.

  1. During one of my twitter frolics recently I found the effing librarian, whose blog I am completely and utterly smitten with. He talks about many of the hot issues in the library world, as well as advocacy and news, but in a completely bitchy and steely way. Love, love, love.
  2. Here is an expansive  booklist of nontraditional gender roles represented in books for children, courtesy of the Allen County Public Library.
  3. This article lists a ton of nontraditional materials that libraries circulate, including cake pans, CPR dummies, and–gasp!–video games (the April 1 date worries me, but as far as I can tell, it is a genuine article; if you discover otherwise, let me know, okay?).
  4. I must mention one more nontraditional library event that is coming up: Nontraditional Nonfiction Monday, coming up on May 24th, to be hosted over at 100 Scope Notes. I’ve never participated in Nonfiction Monday* before, but my first foray is certainly going to be a doozy, since I co-wrote a review in song form with Travis from Scope Notes. Please do check it out, and participate if you have a mind to.

*Here’s the source of Nonfiction Monday, in case you were wondering (which I was, which was why I did some sleuthing and figured it out. Is there anything that Anastasia Suen can’t do? She has a kajillion blogs, all of them terrifically informative, and she put together this Nonfiction Monday meme happening event thingy. I stand in awe. Actually, I sit in awe, but that just sounds weird. Have you realized yet that reading my parentheticals is oftentimes a foolish undertaking? No? It’s okay, we all learn at our own pace.).